Friendship

I’m thinking about friendship today.

I rehearsed in my mind the friends we have. Of course, there many of you are in the group picture.

But first, let’s think for a few moments about how you get to know anyone. For example, you could stop by my office if you wanted to get to know me. That would be the office or study in my home now that I’m retired. My door’s always open, and I am always happy to welcome visitors. That was true when I had an office in academia or business. But there are other ways to get to know me. You could talk to my wife – you’d learn more about me that way. Talk to others who know me. You could keep digging – read my books or some of my writing on my Blog. Or, you could join me for coffee at a favorite spot in downtown Lufkin.

I’ve used a couple of definitions of friendship. Who would you call if you were broken down on the freeway at 2 a.m.? Another is, do you know where the coffee cups are in their house, and do you feel free to get your own coffee? The best definition is who can you trust with your pocketbook, your wife, and your life?

There are church friends. We were in two home groups this past year. That may sound weird. I’ll explain, one group we led was out of the church we attended in Nacogdoches. We are no longer with that group or that church. We have other ministry assignments God wants us to pursue. The other home group we were invited to when we came to Lufkin, Texas, to buy our home. We were invited by Vergie, who lived with us 40-plus years ago, not too long after Tanya and I married. We still go to that group. Interestingly, they are out of a church we’ve never attended.

We are now attending a new church for us. I met the pastor on June 7. We immediately “clicked.” Since then, Tanya and I have met with other ministers for prayer and lunch. We’ve attended several special meetings and the launch of their Saturday evening services. As we sought counsel from those we trusted, it was clear that this was God’s next assignment for us.

I’m writing this partly triggered by the reading of a 95-year-old in Osaka who, after his morning walk, spends time on social media connecting with family and friends. I do that. I sometimes say “Good morning” to one of my friends. His response is likewise very brief. Another friend sends me a Bible verse and a greeting.

Facebook is my primary communication tool with friends. Like most people on Facebook, the algorithms mess with the number of connections. I’m also on LinkedIn. A lot of my former students are there.

I need to practice this more. That is the practice of the rituals of friendship.

A friend gave me a book recently, The Liturgy of the Hours. It’s the discipline of praying at certain hours of the day. Maybe that’s part of it: coming up for air and being disciplined to “practice” friendship.

Anyway, it has me thinking about that which is called friendship. You are getting this in its rawest form.

I do pray each of you is doing well.

If you want to contribute to my Blog on “Practicing the Rituals of Friendship,” please do. I’ll put it together soon.

Keep in touch,

Paul